One More Time
by Enola Tey Esiw
Summary: A group of one-shot right before the final battle, or right after it. Mostly about Rachel, by Rachel, etc... Yes, I made more sad ones. I know, I know...
1. R: Can I?

You know, I've always wondered about the conversation where Jake says, "Hey, Rach, wanna go kill your cousin and get killed?" So I decided to write it. SO there. Haha. : P

* * *

"You might not make it," he said

I stomped my foot. "Does it look like I give a damn?" I demanded.

Jake's war-torn eyes looked at me. But he smiled. "No," he said, "it doesn't. But you need to know. I'm not going to make you come if you don't want you. So now you know the risks. I just need to know if you'll do the job."

His eyes searched me. "It'll hurt. I won't pretend it doesn't. You will have to go and kill your cousin. Can you live with that? I don't care if you can't. You will be scarred. I can't help that. Rachel?" he said as I sat.

I hadn't realized it until he said it. I would have to kill my cousin- the boy I had loved, laughed with, flirted with his friends.

He would be dead. No freedom. Dead.

And I had to kill him.

"Jake," I said. I said it just to be said. He sat beside me.

But this could be the end.

It had to be the end.

"I don't want this to happen, either, Rachel. You know I don't. But… but if we want to end this, I think we'll have to do this. You know I don't want anyone to be hurt. Especially not… not you. Not Tom. But… but if this is what it takes, I have to ask you to do this. I'm not going to force you to do it. Just ask," he said.

If I did this, we had won. I might not come back, but we had won. No more Controllers. No more Yeerks invading.

But if I did it- Cassie would lose her best friend. Tobias the one person who really cared. Marco his _Xena,_ and Jake his cousin.

We would win, but every one of the Animorphs lost.

"Rachel? If you want to say no-"

"Let's go," I said.

And we went.

* * *

Sooooo... yeeeah. YOu know you wanna review... you know you waaaaant toooo...


	2. J: Thanks for the Memories

Dun dun duuuun. Okay, this one is Jake. DICLAIMER: I do not own any of the characters. I do not own Thanks for the Memories, FOB does. Be happy (goes and sulks because I don't own anthing : ( )

* * *

This was happening. The war was ending. It was going to be over. I had changed for the most definite worse, but it was over. Or was soon.

**I'm gonna make you bend and break, **

**(It sends you to me without wait)**

**Say a prayer but let the good times roll! **

**In case God doesn't show... **

**(Let the good times roll, let the good times roll)**

Seeing, in one moment, life and death. Loss and redemption. Crying and laughing. The good times and the bad times.

**And I want these words to make things right, **

**But it's the wrongs that make the words come to life, **

**"Who does he think he is?"**

**If that's the worst you got, **

**Better put your fingers back to the keys! **

Meeting Elfangor that one night. I wished we hadn't, that someone else could fight this for us. But no one could. It was us, had to be us, and was only us.

But right now… it wasn't even an 'us.' It was an 'I,' a 'you,' single. Right now, I was alone.

**One night and one more time, **

**Thanks for the memories, **

**Even though they weren't so great; **

**"He tastes like you only sweeter"! **

**One night, yeah, and one more time, **

**Thanks for the memories, thanks for the memories; **

**"See, he tastes like you only sweeter"! **

These memories… This war changed us so much… The good memories, me and Cassie, on the Iskoort home world…

Meeting Ax, so far below the sea…

Destroying the Kadrona, so long ago…

**Been looking forward to the future, **

**When my eyesight is going bad, **

**And this crystal ball.**

**It's always cloudy except for, (Except for)**

**When you look into the past (look into the past), **

**One night stand... (one night stand off), **

I could see what was going to happen. Rachel will die and we will win. We will win, but the Animorphs shall lose.

And I was to blame.

**One night and one more time, **

**Thanks for the memories, **

**Even though they weren't so great; **

**"He tastes like you only sweeter"! **

**One night, yeah, and one more time, **

**Thanks for the memories, thanks for the memories; **

**"See, he tastes like you only sweeter"! **

One last fight. The battles were tallied- we had won. Or had we? The memories were there, but lost. All I could see was her.

**They say I only think in the form of crunching numbers**

**In hotel rooms collecting page six lovers**

**Get me out of my mind and get you out of those clothes**

**I'm a liner away from getting you into the mood, whoa**

I saw David in that hotel room he broke into as an eagle. I remembered David. What we had had to do.

But did we?

**One night and one more time, **

**Thanks for the memories, **

**Even though they weren't so great; **

**"He tastes like you but sweeter"! **

**One night, yeah, and one more time, **

**Thanks for the memories, thanks for the memories; **

**"He, he tastes like you only sweeter"! **

And, as I saw this, saw what I had done, saw what I had become, I fell.

I fell to the ground and cried. For what we had lost. Marco- he had gained so much, a mother, a father… but looking at him, I saw the hurt on his face. He was wretched from this- what I had caused.

Cassie- she had lost her caring. She didn't _care _anymore. Not as much as she used to. And Rachel- she had lost her best friend.

Me- I had lost it all. I wasn't that kid you saw on the street, practicing basket-ball. I planned for battles. I killed Yeerks.

Tobias- he had lost being human. He gave up his body for this cause.

Rachel- She had lost her life. The thing humans hold closest. She had lost it all.

**One night and one more time, **

**Thanks for the memories, **

**Even though they weren't so great; **

**"He tastes like you but sweeter"! **

**One night, yeah, and one more time, **

**Thanks for the memories, thanks for the memories; **

**"He, he tastes like you only sweeter"! **

Thanks, war, for these memories.

Thanks a WHOLE lot.


	3. T: You & Me

Okay. This one is... errrr... dang. I completely forget, but it's by FOB, and they rock, I love them, please don't be maaaad... I've gona on a song ficcie fanatic thing, so... ja. : )

* * *

Was this fair? No. Rachel had just died. And what we had planned was gone. I knew she had planned too.

**Last year's wishes**

**Are this year's apologies**

**Every last time I come home**

**I take my last chance**

**To burn a bridge or two**

**I only keep myself this sick in the head**

**Cause I know how the words get you off**

Jake- my god, Jake. You ruined it all. I know she said she'd do it, but you knew she was going to die. YOU killed her. Maybe you didn't stab her, deliver the killing blow, but you sent her to her death.

**We're the new face of failure**

**Prettier and younger but not any better off**

**Bullet proof loneliness**

**At best, at best**

She wasn't bullet-proof. Jake knew that. We all knew that. She had broken apart at the chance to leave- I barely remembered that. But she did. She was all weird for a while…

**Me and you**

**Setting in a honeymoon**

**If I woke up next to you**

**If I woke up next to you**

**Me and you**

**Setting in a honeymoon**

**If I woke up next to you**

**If I woke up next to you**

No- we wouldn't go on a honeymoon. Or have a wedding. Not even another kiss, or a final good bye. She was gone.

**Collect the bad habits**

**That you couldn't bare to keep**

**Out of the woods but I love**

**A tree I used to lay beneath**

**Kissed teeth stained red**

**From a sour bottle baby girl**

**With eyes the size of baby worlds**

She knew what she had to do. She shook of being afraid. She was brave. Braver than brave.

**We're the new face of failure**

**Prettier and younger but not any better off**

**Bullet proof loneliness**

**At best, at best**

She was gone. No more strong Rachel- dead. D-E-A-D. Dead.

**The best way**

**To make it through**

**With hearts and wrists intact**

**Is to realize**

**Two out of three ain't bad**

**Ain't bad**

Most of us had gotten through okay. Marco. Jake. Cassie. Me. Ax.

Did I care? No.

**Setting in a honeymoon**

**Me and you**

**Setting in a honeymoon**

**If I wake up next to you**

**If I woke up next to you**

**Me and you**

**Setting in a honeymoon**

**If I wake up next to you**

**(Honeymoon)**

To me? Love was over. Done. I only wanted Rachel. ONLY her and nothing but her.

We had won. But I was lost.

* * *

Ahhhhh. DRAMA. SO nice. I love drama. (giggles) HAAAAAAAAAA HAAAAAAAAAAAA HAAAAAAAAAAAA! I need to work on that evil laugh...

-Enola Tey-


	4. C: Highs

Short one, I know. But it hit me when I re-read my DARE essay that I wrote not long ago... It was a eulogy that I wrote for a person that died of drugs. No one really died, but... people were crying. I was too. Anyway, last chap. was Tobias, and this one is cassie.

* * *

I was back in the barn again. The war was over. I couldn't believe it… the war I had lived and hated but loved for so long was over…

I shoved a pill down a very unhappy raccoons throat. Poor thing. Some kids tried to give it something, drugs or something like that. I smiled slightly at the thought of a raccoon on drugs. Then I realized that we little humans were the animals on drugs and the smile faded.

I realized how the war had been like drugs, kind of. Not really, but I could see the similarities.

Five kids heading home had been hit as little people easy to push for it. We paid with so much- our innocence, our lives, our loves. We had to sell the little things we had- our honesty, our childhood.

Some of us got hit worse than others- Tobias paid so much he lost it all- his world. He was a 'shell,' if you will, of a human, stuck in a bird brain's body.

Marco was someone who found the high scary but fun- he had fought at fisrt but gave in when he saw what his mom was.

Ax was trained for this. I don't nkow what he lost, but he sure wasn;t the little arrogant nitwit we met before.

I lost everything I loved- Jake. Rachel. I lost a lot- we ALL lost a lot- but I lost so little, too.

Jake lost his innocence. He couldn't go out and party, have his real thrill be that kegger party.

Rachel was the reckless one who tried it all- the beer, the cocaine, the everything…

Rachel was the one who had shown the real risk.

She was the one that was dead.

* * *

FYI- I'm against drugs. Just so ya know. I like this chappie- it makes me pround for some... weird... reason.

I have problems.

-Enola Tey-


End file.
